This past NaNoWriMo I worked on and finished a rough rough ROUGH draft of When Lily's Fall. I decided to scrap it all together because I hated it sooo much. I was walking home one night from work and realized why I hated it so badly. The heroine was way too weak and then Lily came to me. I love when that happens. Her entire story popped into my mind. I also decided to make her broken but not weak. She is damaged by men. But her Hero, Valience is also very very damaged as well. I am actually excited to try and skeleton sketch this story out. I don't plot but I skeleton sketch my stories just to get to know all my characters. I have to find all my notes from the original to see if the core story can be saved. I will probably do that after I move so maybe in August. Here is the start of the original. Hope you enjoy it.
Before the Fall
"So you are clear on what it is you must do?"
Valience nodded. "Yes."
"Any questions?" The other man asked. It earned him a sneer.
"Would you have me do this job if I needed questions answered first." And Valience was correct, all knew his reputation. He killed quickly, was competent, and had no time for the why's. Just tell him the who and they were dead. Then, you pay. (This is in red because if I were editing this story it would be deleted.)
Rain fell like angels
The rain fell hard around my car. The wipers worked overtime trying to clear the away the rain. I leaned forward squinting trying to see past the rain. I pulled my car away from the center lane where slick puddles were building up. I had a few miles to go before the exit that would take me away from populated civilization onto my rural gravel road that's lengths were probably flood.
I forced myself to sit back and relax or I give myself a headache. I scolded myself for being so tense. The lights shining off the pavement was doing a good job of that on its own.
I saw my exit coming up so I made my way over to the correct lane and got off the highway. My road was getting flooded so I was going to have to check on the barn when I got home. To make the hey didn’t get soaked. I couldn’t afford to replace it if it got molded. I sighed. Some times I wondered why I even bother trying to keep up with the maintenance of this old decrepit farm. But then I remember my father’s prideful face as he worked the farm by himself, or even when I was out there helping him. He always fought for this farm and at least I could do was no less than what he did. He had left me his pride and joy, all he had when he passed away last year. This farm.
"Lily," he would start. "You can always tell a man's worth by what he leaves his legacy. You are that legacy and this is what I leave you." He would finish the lecture with arms spread wide as he turned in a slow flourishing circle like a king admiring his land. Took me years to say he was a hard working and that was his worth and what he wanted his legacy to be.
And I do admit, on the days when missing him nearly crushed me, being outside, working the farm, I could feel him there right with me. Sometimes I’d even hear him laugh just to turn to see his beaming smile at me and be alone. I missed him so much. Some days more than others. So that is why I must try and keep this farm. It is all I have left of my parents.
They had fell in love on this farm. Raised me on this farm. And I had lost them both. My Mother years ago. When I was a child. I lost her to herself. I pulled up to the house and stopped the car. I prepared myself to be bombarded by the rain.
I stepped out right into a puddle. Greeeat. I slammed the car door and the sound echoed for miles, or so it seemed. I had no neighbors. None at all. I kicked the water form my soaked shoe and hurriedly made my way to my porch. I dropped all my things and then made my way around the house to the back and towards the barn. My hair was slicked to my fast by the time I made it there. I made sure all the animals were safe and dry before I went to the task of sandbagging the barn entrance so the water wouldn’t ruin the hey stacks.
By the time I made it back into the house, I was soaking, shivering and hungry. I showered and dressed in warm dry clothes and set to the task of finding something to eat. I was all to aware, that this big house was awfully lonely tonight.
++ ++ ++
I saw a barn up a head. Finally a shelter from this driving rain. I had traveled through nothing but wooded areas for what seemed like hours. But really it might have been only two. As I drew neared to the shelter I saw a woman lugging sandbags and butting them just inside the barn door and a row or two on the outside. I realized that she had no idea what the hell she was doing. But I did not disturb her. I didn’t want to ruin her pride. When she finally returned to the main house I bunkered up in the barn. The smell of animal didn’t bother me. And the animals didn’t seem too bothered with my smell. So we cohabited in the small, damp but warm barn and I slept. It wasn't a peaceful sleep, but one full of nightmares. Only I was the monster. Since I had awoken in a forest, so it seemed with rain splattering on my face, I could not remember anything but my name. Valience. It seemed to be burned in me so deep that it would never be forgotten. Maybe these nightmares were not dreams at all but memories? My God, I hope not. My God. That seemed familiar. My God, once maybe but I had a feeling that not anymore. Can God be disowned? Of course not. I am being silly. It was me. I was the one disowned?
++ ++ ++
I woke up to the sun. As rainy as it was last night the sun still made its way out this morning. My boots sunk into the mud as I made my way out to the barn to muck the stalls and feed and water all the animals. When I walked up to the barn, I saw that the sandbags stacked up differently than I had originally had them. I pushed them out the way and opened the door.
“Hey, babies. How was your night?” I said to the animals. My words stuck in my throat. There was a man sprawled out on the hey. I froze. Could I back out of here before he noticed? What if he was a psycho killer? I turned to run and the toe of my foot caught on the edge of one of the sandbags. I fell to the ground in a graceless heap.
"Umph!" I tried to scramble to my feet but it was too late. I heard rustling behind me. I turned over and was staring right into the coldest eyes I had ever seen.
Tete-a-tete por dueax
The man looked at me like I was prey. I fought to find my footing. I wanted to face this beast on my feet.
"Do you need my assistance in standing?" The voice was deep but held no feeling. It seemed detached. The aloof man did not wait for my answer because he put his hands underneath my shoulders and pulled me to my feet. He let me go so swiftly I stumbled forward into his chest.
"Sorry. Thank you." I hesitated briefly. "Why are you in my barn?"
"It rained last night." Was his simple reply.
I stared at him. "Yes, I am aware that it rained. I have soggy shoes as proof. Why are you in here."
"Where else would I go? Nothing else is around here." He spoke truly. There was nothing for miles on either side.
"Are you dangerous?" I asked plainly. His dark eyes looked dangerous. Downright deadly.
"I can be but I have no plans or reason to hurt you." He spoke as if that was a perfectly rational thing to say. His blunt honesty was disconcerting.
"Well, come on to the main house. You can shower up while I make breakfast. You can put on some of my dad's clothes. They shouldn't be too bad a fit." I started walking to the house.
"He won't mind?"
I looked back briefly. "What do the dead care."
"So he is dead than?" He spoke as if he were asking after the weather.
"Yes." He took up a pace beside me. I noticed he didn't apologize like everyone else feels the need to do after you hear of once death. I looked out the corner of my eye at him. He hadn't seemed to look over at me in notice.
"Yes?" He asked.
"I am going into the city later, did you need a ride anywhere?"
"No, I wouldn't even know where to go." He didn't offer anymore.
"Homeless than? You don't look homeless."
"I wouldn't know. I don't remember anything before yesterday morning." I stopped and he stopped after a few additional steps.
I took the two steps to him and placed my hands on his head, in examination.
"Are you hurt? Head injury?" He stopped my prodding by taking my hands in his. They were strong hands. He smiled for the first time, albeit a very small one.
"I don't think I am hurt." He looked into my eyes.
"No headache then?" He took one of his hands from me and only then did I realize I was still holding them. He rubbed his brow.
"Yes, When I wake. Then it fades throughout the day."
I began to walk again and tugged on the remaining hand I held.
"Come on. Lets see what can be done."
I got him set up for his shower. I set pain pills and water by the clean clothes and towels I sat out for him. Then I left him so I could prepare breakfast.
++ ++ ++
The towels smelled like the woman, crisp, clean and soapy. The scent of her filled my nostrils from the second I helped her up. The initial fear she felt to the softness she felt when she became concerned.
Her body intrigued me. She had curves beneath her clothes. Her hips and butt, round. Firm would be my guess.
The images of my dreams flashed before my eyes. The things I did in these dreams made me concerned for this generous woman. The things.
I stood on a grassy knoll. Blood, dirt and sweat striking down my face. To my left a breath takingly gorgeous woman stood. She looked feral. We had just shared in a massacre of 185,000 people. Blood soaked her hair.
There was a knock on the door.
"Did you drown in there?"
I opened the door just as I pulled on my shirt. Her eyes went to my t-shirt covered chest. It was a little tight across but apparently she liked what she saw. I successfully fought the urge to smile.
"I'm done." I informed her. She shook her head and visibly forced herself to look me in the eyes. I saw a delicious heat behind them.
"Breakfast is ready. Hope you have an appetite. I don't remember how much guys eat so I made a lot." She prattled.
I shrugged. "You don't spend time with a lot of guys?"
She mirrored my shrug back to me. "I do, we just don't spend the time eating." She paused, then added. "Not food anyway." I noticed a spark in her eyes before she turned to walk away.
I watched her lead the way, pausing to take in the view before following her.
I enjoyed the heat this woman made me feel. I couldn't remember having this feeling and couldn't help wondering if I had; if so who had I felt it with before. How was it even possible to forget this inquichable heat?
++ ++ ++
I felt his eyes on me as I lead the way to the dining room. I felt sort of uncomfortable but I also liked it and welcomed the attention.
“Take a seat."
Hung Out to Die
1 day ago